"Toddlers have their bad days - but temper tantrums are another thing."
I reviewed a few sites about toddlers having temper tantrums because I have a 16 month-old daughter who has temper tantrums on a regular basis. Being a single mom, and going to school full-time, while raising a toddler is not always easy.
Almost every morning, my daughter throws herself to the floor, gets irritated about every little thing, throws her toys at me, and demands that I fix everything for her. Meanwhile, I am scrambling to get her ready for daycare, so I can make it to school on time. This occurs after I pick her up from daycare as well. I often struggle with preparing her for a bath, even a nap. After she has had her nap, she continues to demand that everything goes her way up until bed time. When she wants something her way, she wants it her way, and no other way.
I needed to find some different perspectives on how to deal with my toddler having temper tantrums. I read a blog site written by Criscordero on how to deal with toddler temper tantrums. Here is the link to the site:
His blog site explains that children between the ages of 1-2 often have tantrums because:
- their world is fairly straightforward
- it is their way of ordering, and putting things in place
- they are tired
- they are frustrated
- they are coming down with something (like a cold, fever, flu)
- they are trying to gain control over their daily activities
- and the parent/guardian is not always available to play, sing, read, and hold the toddler
There are ways to avoid fatiguing tantrums:
- When you notice that your child is getting tired, you can lay down with him/her down for a nap, which is also a great way of connecting with your child.
- If you are busy and can't attend to your child immediately, you can give him/her a toy or food to distract him/her for awhile.
Toddlers are at the age of understanding their sense of "self", and they are different individuals from their parents/guardians. Toddlers have their limited ways of expressing their needs. When they are denied whatever they are seeking, they will often have a tantrum. Once your child is becoming independent, there are good ways of bringing out their good behaviour. You can involve them in decision making, or you can give them independent tasks such as: making their bed, throwing the garbage, putting away toys when done playing, sitting down at the table when wanting a snack. You also must be firm and consistent with behaviour that is inappropriate. When your child is having a tantrum the best way is to deal with it is to ignore them, but not leave them alone. If you leave your child alone, he/she may think you are abandoning him/her. If your child is having a tantrum that involves disruptive or aggressive behaviour - the best course of action is to take the child to a quiet place and have a time-out until he/she calms down. They key to successfully dealing with tantrums is not to lose your own temper. If you are unable to remain calm during the process, put the child in their time-out, and give yourself a few moments to gain yourself.
I find this information to be very useful because I often do not know how to handle my daughter's tantrums. There are times when I do get frustrated and walk out of her sight, just to give myself a few moments to calm myself. Many of the reasons for her tantrums to occur is because she is either tired or hungry, and simply just requires help with some of her daily activities. As a mother, I often have to take extra time out to spend with my daughter. When she is sleeping, I often give myself time to do get things done: such as watching tv, getting daily tasks done, doing homework. Etc. The pay off is rewarding because I feel that I have accomplished my tasks, while handling my daughter and her tantrums.
I also checked out another blog site that might be useful. It is about rewarding toddlers who behave well. Check it out:
I think you are a wonderful mother!
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